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Good Enough…

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It’s Christmas Eve! I sit here and look out my kitchen window like I do every morning with my 100th cup of coffee and computer screen. I see barely a dusting of snow on the ground…in fact we have green grass showing through. To some of you this maybe normal or even cold and out of character for your home…but for us in Minnesota, it is WEIRD. Hard to believe it is indeed Christmas.

I love Christmas – the decorating, wrapping presents, baking and entertaining. I used to try and copy Martha Stewart to the T. But things I have learned over the years – especially this year – why break my neck to make it a PERFECT holiday  – PERFECT in Martha Stewart’s mind?! This year’s motto is “Good Enough”. Don’t get me wrong, it’s not that I don’t care about the holiday and all its beauty…I just value sanity and happiness much more.

We put our tree up over Thanksgiving weekend and pulled out all the decorations and had fun putting everything in its place. We still get a real tree – instead of going to a heated INDOOR greenhouse to buy it for an unreasonable amount of money; we went to a parking lot and bought one from the local Lions organization. Best tree ever! But even after being the ONLY person who thinks to water it religiously every morning, it still resembles this:

tree

But that is ok, it smells good and the vacuum works – despite what my kids think.

We (I mean Mike) put our lights up on a mild fall weekend. Love them. Even broke down and let the kids turn them on BEFORE Thanksgiving! And guess what? We have a 6′ section that went out – oh well! We have neighbors that light up the town with their LED lights – so we felt like it made up for our lack of 6′ section of burnt out ones.

I love to bake cookies every year with my girls. Time was running out – so store bought premade peanut butter cookie dough and a bag of Hershey Kisses worked just fine and tasted just the same. We still had the experience and less clean up! win – win! We did make one homemade dough – that we will bake today – Christmas Eve.

elf on shelf

Elf on the Shelf? I didn’t even locate her til last week! I apparently didn’t put her back in her official box. And you know what? That’s ok. I have all these fun ideas for our elf Grace Noel from Pinterest I see in October…but by the time December rolls around I forget. Perhaps she will visit us in February instead. Valentine’s elf! Hey, might be a money making idea there!!

bowsI used to take wrapping presents VERY seriously. REAL ribbons tied in a bow, matching wrapping paper and tags. This year…tacky sticky bows, tags may or may not match…but you know what? Who cares! Along with the mixed matched wrapping and bows – I REFUSE to keep up with the Jones. No kids, you are not getting a laptop, ipad, new phone, trip to Disney or $80 yoga pants- even though you REALLY want those and they are on your list. You know why? Because we are not made of money. I refuse to go into debt over gift giving. You WILL get things on your list – things that you will like and be excited for. I still love you more than anything in this world – but I will not buy your love just so you fit in with the “cool kids”. You WILL appreciate this when you are a parent! xoxo

eddieA Wonderful Life? Never seen it. A Christmas Story – nope. Miracle on 34th Street – nope nope and nope. But what my family has seen a gazillion times – Christmas Vacation, Elf and the classic Claymation specials. We do love cousin Eddie with his Dickie, snot the dog and his famous line “The shitter’s full” – and we can quote the whole movie ELF line for line. Those are our movie traditions – and we all laugh til our sides hurt.

Christmas cards? I didn’t do them this year. Not that I didn’t want to, but because something needed to give. I love designing our cards every year, coming up with a fun theme and mailing them out. But this year I decided nope. I creatively copy/pasted some pics from the year together and slapped that baby on Facebook. Done! Check! Merry Christmas from our house to yours.

I guess what I am trying to say is that there is only so much time, money and energy this year. I refuse to be the crabby bitchy mom/wife that is yelling that things need to be perfect, that we are running late and worrying about how much did we spend!?!? This year I said “Good Enough”.  And it felt good. I am not a scrooge or even a Grinch….I just needed to have realistic goals with the time I had. Norman Rockwell? No. This year I will drink wine to celebrate not to medicate! So cheers! Merry Christmas from our family to yours!

 

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I wrote a book…

cover pic good   I am feeling emotional as I sit here and realize I WROTE A BOOK! I never ever thought that would be something I would do in my life. Funny… I also never thought I would have been a pregnant teen, experience infertility and adopt children. Life certainly has a way of surprising you.

My story is also my journey of healing and understanding why things happen, how we deal or don’t deal with them. This whole process opened up my eyes to feelings I never thought I would equate with motherhood. Feelings of being scared, angry, hurt, devastated, humiliated and alone. But also feeling joy, amazement, unconditional love, a full heart, wonder and awe.

On this day – the official release day of a project that is so near and dear to my heart, I am overwhelmed. So many people have already read it – and so many more hopefully will. I want this to be a book that people – in any of the stages of motherhood I was in – can learn from, take comfort in, find their own bravery and courage and find peace in whatever journey God sends them on.