Jillsy's Blog

being a wife…birth mom…adoptive mom….dealing with infertillty & life

Signs…. April 3, 2011

Filed under: Uncategorized — jillsy @ 7:51 pm

  “If only God would give me some clear sign! Making a large deposit in my name in a Swiss bank” – Woody Allen

 “Signs, signs everywhere there’s signs – blocking up the scenery – breaking up my mind”  – Five Man Electrical Band

 “When suffering comes, we yearn for some sign from God, forgetting we have just had one” – Mignon McLaughlin

     So…I got to thinking about all the signs we encounter throughout our lives. Signs that are crafted by man and signs we receive from above. I believe the signs from above are from God. But let’s start with the signs from man. When you stop and think about it, there are signs for EVERYTHING. Which public restroom you use, which lane you turn in, where to exit, where to come in, the name of a store, the price of gas….and the list goes on and on.

 Then we have the signs that keep us safe…STOP, Employees must wash hands, Slow: children at play, speed limits, Emergency Room…and again that list can go on and on…but these signs most likely originated due to something tragic happening.

But then we have the signs that are man made AND from God. Signs of Spring: baseball season, motorcycles, bikes and scooters out from the toy shed, spring break, tulips popping up from the once frozen ground, leaves starting to bud, the first robin chirping and neighbors slowly coming out to gather and comment on the long cold winter that was just had.  Same can go for all seasons…..

Now let’s talk about signs out of our hands – the signs from God – the REAL signs also known to some as “coincidences”….I believe they are signs from God, not a coincidence. The kind of signs that give you goose bumps, send shivers down your spine, leave you speechless. Altho, some signs we don’t see until much later on…these are the signs that come to us in the form of pain and suffering – the times where we question God and wonder “WHY?”.

Once I found out that I could not conceive a child I was devastated. What kind of sign was this?  After adopting my two daughters I saw that the pain itself was a sign – to show me the true blessing and gift of adoption.  After we had adopted Maddie, we assumed this would be our only child – adoption is sooooo expensive. But a couple years later we were blessed with a great tax return. It wasn’t a “Cool – let’s blow it on a dream vacation or a new TV or car” but a sign that we could have another baby bless our lives. I remember when we had gotten our “referral” for Olivia – that is the paperwork all about this little baby from another country that will be yours. In her papers she had a rough go at it when she was born – we didnt understand any of the medical jargon. So we went to see a family doctor at our local clinic – we desparately needed someone to explain it all to us in English. As we were waiting in the room we saw the medical degree hanging on the wall of another Dr….a Dr. Park….PARK – that was Olivia’s Korean last name – sure that could be a coincidence since Park is one of the # 1 last names in Korea….but we took it as a sign that our little girl was going to be just fine. And she was. Another sign from God for me was finding my birth son. I had thought about him everyday for 23 years and knew someday the time would be right. I typed his name into the search box on Facebook of all places. Instead of a list of 300 people with that name coming up – HIS page came up – his beautiful face looking back at me. That was a sign that THIS was the time for me to reach out. God wasnt ready for us to meet sooner – this was the plan….this was the SIGN I needed. 

 A friend of mine grew up not really believeing or knowing if there was a God. He would feel a sort of pulling at him but just wasnt sure. One day up north (in God’s country – how ironic!) he prayed for the first time – he so wanted to see a sunrise up top a cliff – but was so not a morning person. So he asked God – if he was indeed real – wake him for that sunrise. He woke to a foggy hazy morning…climbed the cliff and above all the haze and fog saw the sunrise….not only did he see the sunrise, but he looked down and there in the dirt was a cross made out of two sticks tied together with string….a cross that was not there the afternoon before. A SIGN.  

I know all this may sound quirky to some of you – that is ok. I BELIEVE that all those coincidences are God Blinks (as my friend calls them) – signs from above guiding us and helping us find the way….

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