Adoption, birth mom, family, infertility, mom, Uncategorized

Coffee shop…

Think of the number of people that frequent a coffee shop. You see people sitting there and wonder what is their story… the tired person not quite awake needing one more cup of coffee, professionals meeting for a business appointment, stay home moms needing adult conversation and caffeine while their kids play, senior citizens meeting to play cards, a person enjoying free wi-fi and a cup of coffee in peace, old friends catching up over a cup and let’s not forget all the people just stopping in for their coffee drink to go.
My reason was quite different THIS time. I was going to meet my birth son for the first time. After a couple weeks of getting to know each other through a series of emails…he was ready to meet. I was thrilled. I told him to pick the time and place and I would be there!  So he did – our local coffee chain – Saturday May 29 – 1:30. A date that I will always remember. The week leading up to our meeting was looong. Saturday couldn’t get here fast enough. I was nervous, excited, no words to really describe it. I couldn’t eat…couldn’t sleep…but all I COULD do was think about it.  I surrounded myself that week with tasks to complete, friends to hang out with, busy stuff to make each day go by quickly without much thought….I guess it was my “nesting”  phase. 🙂  The day came – I was thankful for my god daughter’s 3rd bday party in the morning to help take my mind of my nerves (and that it was her birthday!!)  So nervous I actually turned down cake!  After the party – I stopped at home, gathered my thoughts and decided I would go early…that would help settle my nerves – I had NEVER in my life been so nervous for anything – I couldn’t focus on anything but meeting him. I had it planned to get the couch vs. sterile table and chairs. I would sit and wait and look everytime the door opened. I got there early – walk over to the couch area…he was already there – sitting reading his book and in the same seat I was going to pick – (ok, coincidence or just also enjoyed a comfy chair).  I say “So you came early too!?” – that broke the ice…He stood up – TALL like his dad. I asked him if it was wierd if I gave him a hug and he said no….so I did. The first few minutes I felt as tho we kept looking at each other in disbelief and thinking “This is so wierd (in a good way) and so great” .  The next 3 hours we spent laughing and talking and getting to know one another in person. The time went by so fast…we both wanted to go forward with this new relationship – slowly. We walked out together – hugged and said our good byes. I was on such an emotional high. He was this wonderful polite, all together wonderful young man.  I couldnt help but think of his mom and dad – what a great son they had raised and how thankful I got to finally meet him and be in his life after 22 years. This truly was one of the best days of my life – same level as marrying Mike and getting my two beautiful daughters…..


2 thoughts on “Coffee shop…”

  1. Hi Jill,
    Molly found your blog via facebook and passed the address onto me. Wow, what a talented writer you are. You have such a way with words. Your story is a great one. It made me laugh, cry, smile and think. I am so happy for you that you have finally gotten to meet Joshua. I am always a sucker for a happy ending. Keep writing. You have a talent.

    Debbe (Riley) Carroll

  2. Jilly,
    Wow, you have waited a long time for this. I am so happy that you have been able to get some of your questions answered. I apologize for being such a lame friend in college and not knowing the full extent of your heartache. How could we have been so out of touch with all the things that you were going through. You are the bravest person I know. I hope telling your story brings you comfort and a great new relationship with Joshua. You did an amazing thing…..has it really been 22 years?

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